Birthday countdown....on second thought, I'd rather not....

Ugh.

My birthday is Saturday.
And although I have fun plans lined up for the day...
I'm anything but excited.

When exactly did I become so old that I stopped looking forward

to my birthday and started dreading it?

and I'm all too aware that someday I'll look back on turning 27 and laugh

at myself for thinking I was old....
Thats really gonna suck.

Ugh.

It's so odd to realize that you're not the youngest

person at your job anymore, or not the youngest person

in your group of friends anymore.

It's even more strange to realize that at 27 I'm not

exactly in the 'place' that I'd thought I'd be.
I think that's really where the uneasiness lies...
it doesn't so much have to do with the actual birthday,
but more a subconscious expectation we had for ourselves.

I always thought that I'd have my first baby when I was 27.

But the truth is, that's probably not going to happen.

and I'm trying to get to a place where I'm 'ok' with that.

I'm doing my best not to dwell on the few things
 that aren't exactly the way I thought they'd be.
Because I have way too much to be thankful for...

I'm healthy.
(minus the head cold I've seemed to acquire the last 2 days..)

I have a job I love.

I have a great home.

I have amazing friends 
(and an awesome best friend.)

I have a husband who I love
A family I adore.
And a God that will never leave me.

Patience is a virtue.

I am learning to be patient with myself and with the
plan that God has for me.
I am learning to deal with the consequences for choices I've made.

It's not always easy.
That being said,
 I truly believe that God can make very good things
come from very bad things,
and yes I realize that I'm being vague...
but let's be honest...no one reads this but me and I know
exactly what I'm referring to :)

So if 'time' is the hand that I'm being dealt, than I want to
appreciate every minute and try to make the best
out of every day I'm given.
So I will hopefully one day learn to...

Appreciate my health.
Become a better nurse.
Make my house a home.
Be the best friend I can be.
Better meet my husbands needs.
Show my family I love them,
and truly appreciate my never-ending
Salvation.